Christmas morning in Canada, the sunrays were dancing and reflecting in the pristine fresh snow outside that was sparkling, looking alive and providing a spectacular show. The gorgeous winter wonderland was at its best, with Mother Nature dressing its majestic white coat.
The two brothers came running down the stairs bursting in excitement, eager to see what they got under the Christmas tree. One was always pessimistic the other an eternal chronic optimist.
The pessimist got a beautiful bike, with all the bells and whistles, the dream of most kids his age. He frowned and was sad with his discovery. He said, “I don’t know about this. It is winter; I will have to wait till spring to use it. Also I can have an accident, fall and break an arm or a leg. If I take it to school the bullies will beat me up to take it from me. Oh my, I am always unlucky, he whined in absolute disgust”.
His brother got a small package. He quickly peeled off the wrapping, his eyes, shining like the snow outside, in anticipation of a big surprise.
His avid little fingers got rid of the wrapping paper revealing a little neat box. He opened the box and it was filled to the top with fresh manure. Wow! he exclaimed proud of his gift with his heart pumping fast. He ran frantically around the house asking to his parents and relatives “Did you see my horse? Guys, have you seen my horse?”
My friends, I am convinced that there are two types of situations in life, those that are unavoidable and the ones we can somehow influence the outcome with our attitude and perseverance.
We can walk around swimming in misery, drowning in bad vibes, thinking “poor me, nothing good will ever come my way”, with a gloomy dark cloud over our heads or see the proverbial light at the end of the tunnel. It is always better to be positive. Negativism attracts only misfortune itself. Not a pleasant companion.
We can go through life whining, down, feeling miserable and ever discontent or we can see the positive side of things. Most of us go through ups and downs, the eternal cycle described by the I Ching.
It was said “from the ripe fruit comes rotten matter, from rotten matter fertility”. Chinese wisdom.
Perhaps the secret of success and happiness is to take advantage, learn, even with the worst scenarios we are confronted with.
Sometimes we go through major challenges in our lives. In the personal front, my divorce was a devastating experience for me. I lost over 30 kilos in 4 months, profoundly disgusted, depressed, stressed and hopeless. Besides a huge financial loss, my mind was in disarray, my heart shredded to pieces emotionally speaking.
To make matters worse, since my immune system was shut off temporarily, an opportunistic virus decided to make my heart his dwelling. Suddenly, out of the blue, I see myself in an intensive care unit, surrounded by astonished doctors, intrigued by the total disarray of my body, all major organs out of order, my life literally hanging by a thread. At one point they stationed a defibrillator next to me, ready for action.
I have worked long enough in two major hospitals in the emergency room, to know that those steps were being taken because my heart was giving up and a cardiac arrest seemed imminent. It did not look good at all. They were preparing for the worst-case scenario.
My pulse was in the stratosphere running faster the a Ferrari I had congestive heart failure and the weakened heart being compressed by fluids was fighting desperately to keep functional, to do its work, which is pump blood. Fighting bravely to the end.
I had right atrium fibrillation; the whole thing was a mess. Death was a very real and likely possibility. My lungs filled with fluid. My breathing severely affected, labored. Too many fronts to battle, the doctors were really busy running around, the nurses all over the place.
The machines beeping making ghostly sounds, the doctors simply did not understand what was going on. Four well trained, seasoned and experienced cardiologists talking in low voice, looking at their fancy machines and looking at me. I felt, this is it, I better say my prayers, I am about to meet my Creator.
Once they controlled the critical stage I was taken to a room, which became my house for a month. No diagnostic, they baptized my illness as “idiopathic” which means “unknown disease”. Not very reassuring, but my long Calvary and agony was just about to start. The game was on foot; the struggle was ready to commence. They needed answers, a plausible scientific based convincing explanation; they were puzzled by all those events. I did not have a cardiac history.
I had dozens and dozens of tests, blood works 3 times a day, hand lots of drugs, endless sophisticated exams even 3D ultra sound and every fancy procedure known from medical science to date. Several top professors and doctors were consulted, exams even sent to other countries to ask the opinion of outstanding doctors and scientists that study bizarre and rare diseases, from which we find just a footnote in the Pathology books. Still no conclusive diagnose. I was utterly depressed.
One day I was alone in my room and quietly few tears ran on my face. I felt that there was no way out, it was the end of the line for me. Game over. I cried not by fear of death (Tanatophobia) because it will come to all of us we like it or not. I was feeling sorry for my young son, I would not be there for him in the major events in his life, graduation, wedding, see my grandchildren, play in the park with them etc.
I am a Christian; I made sure that I had my Bible with me when the ambulance came to my home to take me to the hospital. I held my Bible and opened in a page, by chance. God was telling Isaiah, one of the greatest prophets “Do not fear, I am thy God, I will hold you by your right hand and protect you”. That was the turning point. I said to myself I cannot afford to die now, my boy needs me.
One week later, all the parameters went back to normality, the doctors in awe sent me home pleased with the outcome, still without comprehending the nature of the illness. To this day they don’t know what was the problem. The good news is that I am alive and strong as ever. I should classify this as a near death experience.
I credit my God and my faith in Him for being here today writing these lines for you.
Faith is a very powerful positive tool. A recent study published in a prestigious professional medical journal, acknowledges that beyond doubt faith plays an important part in the recovery of many morbid situations, it is the epitome of positive thinking.
My sister was once visiting a close friend that was a Thalidomide baby. For those too young that never heard about this infamous and dreadful drug, Thalidomide was a drug developed in Germany that caused birth deformities (teratogenic effects) in babies some 45 years ago.
The results were awful, tragic, devastating, a haunting nightmare; babies were being born with deformed or not fully developed limbs and spina bifida (the spine does not fuse at the end). Most succumbed at birth, did not resist. They also had multiple major organs complications. Perhaps these were the lucky ones.
The lady, my sister friend, had just short stumps with small fingers at the end instead of normal arms, hands and fingers. Her “arms” were about one third of the length of a normally developed adult arm. Difficult, to say the least, to understand how would be possible for her to do the simplest task. But she got married, gave birth to a beautiful and normal baby and lived a normal and independent life. God is indeed always merciful.
When my sister got back home she was telling us, “After I left my friend’s home, I felt that I was the one with disabilities. At one point, she was taking care of her baby, cooking dinner and ironing her husband’s shirts. I could not do all this so well the way she did”.
Studying the lives of great people, like for example Gandhi, Mother Theresa of Calcutta, Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. we see that these special human beings had a common denominator. A powerful invisible force moved them forward. They all had a dream, a special vision, an ideal, a sense of duty, a strong resolve and above all a positive approach towards life. They faced their problems head on, fearlessly. Their personalities were larger than life, true icons.
Even now, when I listen to the first words of Dr. King’s immortal speech “I have a dream”, it sends a strong message to my heart and makes me emotional.
Through peaceful means, they made an immense difference in the world, a legacy of hope for better days ahead.
Collectively, the best example of the human ability to face the most insurmountable challenges is in my opinion the construction of the Great Wall by the great Chinese people. They had no choice they had to do it.
Constantly invaded and harassed by hordes of crude, brutal and merciless barbarians, excellent warriors, horsemen and skilled archers, plundering and vandalizing their country, the construction of such formidable structure was a do or die endeavor for the hard working Chinese people. Thousands died.
Perhaps even with today’s sophisticated technology and engineering, incredibly powerful machinery and all the resources at our disposal, this would be an impossible achievement not to mention the horrendous cost.
Positive thinking applies to everything in our lives. We are a community in which most people are looking for a good and decent person to establish a relationship leading to a commitment and the formation of a family.
I was chatting once with a lady on CLM/ALM and she said, “with so many beautiful ladies, why did you contact me?” My answer to her was very simple; I told her that I was searching for a good, decent, honest and wholesome person to be my partner in life. She seemed to fit my idea of a good person. Why wouldn’t we try? She got the idea.
I feel that I am no better than anybody else, but also I am not the last human being in the face of the planet. I would never be afraid of contacting anyone. There are only two possible results for the equation, the person empathizes with me or not, no third option.
Ladies and gentlemen, lasses and lads do not ever think, “she is too good for me, I do not stand a chance in Heavens” or “he is too good for me, he will not answer my message”. Go for it!!! Some call it fate, destiny, will of God, luck. Say what you will, one thing I can assure you all, if you don’t try, you will never know if the person that attracted you would respond to your message. You will wonder forever.
You cannot lose if you don’t try, that is for sure, but in the other hand you cannot win either.
The two boys of the tale will grow up and get on with their lives; one will stand better chances than the other to succeed in life, you can easily figure out who is who.
God bless you all.
sometimes when bad thing come to us, we complaining to God, why me..?
but we should realized that's life..ups and down is art of a life..
why we r not choosing to be an optimistic person then..?
life is wonderfull & beautifull..
Two thumbs for you daniel..